The officer and I were out for date night when in walked a chick I hadn’t seen in many, many years. We weren’t friends nor did we have friends that were friends. In fact, if she had just been plain and quite like myself I probably wouldn’t have even noticed her. But, she wasn’t. She was always very different in appearance. Wearing bright hair and clothing and I would have never thought to put together, big glasses (she was geek chic before geek chic was cool)
She was intelligent from what I was able to gather- very artiste, great imagine with the ability to have her visions unravel, reveled and come to life when she put a pencil to paper. I liked and admired her, but she never knew.
As her and her man walked in, I noticed a female child tailing behind her—oh I thought, she a mom! Those judgey mommy thoughts (don’t act like you don’t have them) quickly started racing as I wondered what kind of mommy she was. Her daughter who had brown hair had on a bright and I mean get your fucking sunglass kind of bright red wing—the wing was tied in two pony tails held together on each side by a small tiny bow. Instantly, I liked her mommy style. I was in love with the fact she was confident enough in her parenting (I like to call it mothering) and in her daughter to allow her to wear such a thing out in public. Did people stare? I couldn’t tell ya because I was too busy staring incognito.
I quickly elbowed the officer. Look, that’s so and so I said—she was always kind of different. Look, I guess that’s her daughter- isn’t that awesome that she allowed her to wear that god awful wig? Just fucking awesome! I took a drink of my beer,the officer agreed, yep that is pretty cool he said.
I continued on to my food , impressed by what I had just saw, questioning if I too was confident enough in my mothering to allow my child to go against what the world presumes as “normal and or acceptable” I mean I’ve let Max were cowboy boots with shorts to the store several times (Hey! to me, that’s big) I mean this is coming from the girl pre-motherhood that swore her kid would never be caught dead in those tacky ass cartoon t-shirts(yeah well, let’s just say we have more than a couple hanging in Max’s closet) And I mean I’d let him wear a superman cape to the store or the restaurant if he wanted, —but he’s little and that kind of thing is cute when they’re little. Right? So what about when they aren’t so little—what about when they are 8,9, 10 would I still carry that confidence and feel the same way about it as I do now?
If Max wanted to wear a bright yellow Mohawk shaped wig out to Wal-Mart while we grabbed a few things would I throw a fit and cause a fight on the way out the front door? Or would I say you ready? Cool wig. At this point; staring at my sweet, cute, terrible 3-year-old that desperately wants to be Spiderman I can only speculate that I’d be ok with it.
I guess I’m more of the you make a huge deal about it and it’ll stick with ya versus give a little and it’s sure to fade away type. Plus, if it’s not hurting Max or anyone else who cares if the lady we pass in Wal-Mart thinks it’s acceptable. Sadly, it’s all about looks in this world and sadly many aren’t given the chance to display their intelligent because of it. Our society today lacks tolerance for anything or anyone that doesn’t appear to be what they’ve conjured up as “normal”. Ignorance is a sad, frustrating and scary thing.
So to the mom that let her kid be her kid- here’s to you lady!! I think you fucking rock!
How far you would go in letting your kid, be your kid?
Happy Parenting y’all!