I completely loathe (is that spelled right) packing to go out of town, but what I have discovered I hate even more than the packing, is the unpacking and laundry when you return. The officer and I have both decided…it sucks balls (you know it’s hard for me to be lady like)
We had a great little weekend outing. My mood was in check all weekend long which was miracle of both God and medication. I killed no one! Though, there was a 4-year-old I had my eye on. He was a mean little shit! A total bully. (yes I think bully’s at 4 exists—they pick it up from somewhere. My guess would be his daddy-but we won’t go there) the one thing I did note this weekend were all the different parenting methods surrounding me, some like mine and some completely different and some completely non-existent.
I never really paid attention to the interaction of a parent a child until I had one. I mean, I’d hear a mom raise her voice or talk shitty and would look at whomever I was with and give my reasoning as to why she is a shitty mother or how I (childless at the time) would have handled it better—-ahhh, I knew it all! But then again, I think we all do when we’re kidless—it’s so much easier to know exactly how to handle things when it’s someone else’s kid.
All the kids with the exception of that one 4-year-old from hell were extremely well-behaved and polite. Then there was my kid who was also very welled behaved, being an awesome listener, but whom also pointed to a man with a mustache walking by and said, (very fucking loud of course) “dirty mustache—look at that dirty mustache momma) I quickly handled the situation—why the hell would he call someonse’s mustaches dirty? I mean, don’t like them either, but shit—then I realized. At this age, I don’t think they grasp the concept of thinking without saying. Nope, whatever thoughts are transmitted come right out of their mouths! (I can’t blame him, sometimes I have that issue lol)
Last year I took tons of pictures. This year not so much. I was more active with Max this year verus last. I cared more about having fun with him rather than catching that perfect shot. We swam, we dug in the sand, we rode in a horse carriage (which he loved) he rode his bike, he rode in his wagon, he searched for rocks, pinecones, and of course robot and alien tracks.(which we found) we took in all the elements and it served well for all of us.
With my direction to cut back on drinking I honestly thought I’d have a hard time enjoying myself, you know struggle with being able to let go, but I didn’t….
The place we went is a river house kind of setting- very much wildlife and nature. Since Max has been protecting the universe from alligators for the last couple of months ensuring families sleep well—it came as no surprise to me when we were sitting at breakfast in a restaurant that overlooks the river and he stands up in his chair, points and screams, “Alligator” Everyone looked and sure as shit—there was an alligator on the edge of the river. Yup, that’s my kid—the alligator hunter. He got out of his chair and ran to the window. This is the first time he’s ever seen a “real” alligator. It’s big he said. It got big eyes, I get it!
There were several moments I had to take my advice to stop, breath and listen—it took what felt like 5 mins every time, but I was able to return to my happy place. I was able to feed off of the good energy of Max. It was amazing not keeping track of time, not looking at the clock to ensure we’re on schedule. There was several times the officer asked, what time is it? Hell, I didn’t have a clue and it felt good saying it. He, the officer had a good time as well, but he always does. He’s very much happy-go-lucky and the fact of the matter that it comes so easy for him, makes me fucking sick(but I mean hey, when you’re able to take shots who wouldn’t be happy-go-lucky)
We decided on this spot because when we went last year we had such a good time especially Max, whom was 2 at the time. I think next week we may change it up though—I’m thinking a beachfront condo…Momma loves the beach. The days of this weekend flew by so quickly much like the days, months and years of our lives…Max’s life. Precious moments-anxiety did not win—that damn 4-year-old from hell almost did, but anxiety did not!
Tonight it’s back to the grind. Baths and routine—getting ready for the week ahead. It’s so hard to get back into the grove when you’ve had such a relaxing time. Oh well, back to being a mom in a world ran by a schedule.