Same shit, different day my friends. It’s another slow day at the office and even after two cups of coffee and 8 hours of sleep I’m still fighting to keep my eyes open. Yeah I know—you mothers of newborns and infants are looking at that 8 hours of sleep and screaming, “Fuck you!” But, I … Continue reading »
Tagged with mom humor …
My fall from grace.
I’ve been a bum- a slacker of sorts I guess you could say. You see I use to be the best “unofficial” home room mom for the Monster’s daycare class and now…..well now I’m just lazy. Once a week I was bringing cookies or cupcakes up for the kids to enjoy and I’m not just talking … Continue reading »
Post it note; Enough is enough
Dear family and friends alike; Take a look at the photo below. Yes, it’s my sweet preicous Monster will all his lovely angry birds. Lovely angry birds in which sleep in my bed with me. So now, not only do I have a 4 year old that likes to sleep with his legs across my … Continue reading »
Different Eyes
They told me I would regret it. They told me I can’t just have one (and we’re not talking potato chips) They told me I needed one of each. They told me not to do that to my child. They told me to wait a few years. They told me I’d change my mind. I … Continue reading »
Post it note: The parking lot bully
I didn’t think we’d ever make it to Friday and now that we’re here it seems like forever until the clock hits 4:30 and I’m released into freedom. I’ve got some bad news people, brace yourself. Tomorrow we have a play date. The good news? It’s at my house in which is stocked with vodka.. … Continue reading »
It’s only juice boxes!
Lately, I’ve been forgetful. I mean forgive me, I am a mother and I think we should be excused and allowed to forget things on the daily. Feeling down about your mothering? Here, allow me to help you out….. Monday morning I forgot to take the Monster’s clean pillow and blanket to school for nap. … Continue reading »
Happy Birthday
Today my sweet Monster turns 4 years old. I’m emotional. I’m emotional that he’s getting so fucking big so fucking quick. Who would have thought? I mean you always hear people talk about how they grow up so quickly, but I honestly had no idea those idiots knew exactly what they were talking about, that … Continue reading »
One of those days.
Today is a sick day. I called in, once again to take the Monster to visit our second home—that being the pediatrician’s office. The verdict this time? Pharyngitis. Personally, I think its strep again and we just caught it too early, but I guess we’ll see. Mothers are always right when it comes to their children’s diagnosis, always. Because … Continue reading »
Post it note: Birthday invitations.
The Monster’s Angry Bird birthday bash was this weekend. Everything went well. The small gathering that I had envisioned in my head turned out to be a larger crowd than had originally thought. It was perfect thought, the more people meant the more kids for the Monster to play with. I’ve decided that next year … Continue reading »
The transition
It’s Thursday. The only reason I can tolerate Thursday is because I know its counter part, Friday is peaking around the corner or I’d hate it just as much as Monday. Meanwhile, it’s raining it’s ass off here. Naturally, this means the roads are full of idiots that forget how to drive when it slightly sprinkles … Continue reading »
