6 Remarkable Things I Learned When My Mom Was Sick With Cancer

As I struggled to understand how God could have taken away my mother, a woman whose strength and determination molded my life in so many indelible ways, several things came to my mind of the many remarkable things I learned through the painful process of my mom being diagnosed with and dying 6 months later from lung cancer.

THIS POST MAY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS. PLEASE READ MY DISCLOSURE HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

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1. Many Pharmaceutical Companies Have Programs Set Up To Help Pay For Medications.

When my mom had cancer, she had an issue with blood clots. I had to give her injections every day to prevent them. 
For a while there we were ok because my mom’s Dr had given me a supply that I used to give to her. Well, the time came where we were running out and I had to get more. The Dr’s office gave me a prescription to fill at the pharmacy.  When I drove through the pharmacy pickup, the lady at the other end gave me the total…that will be $12,784.00 ….. ummmm what? I thought I heard her wrong.

Nope. She told me the total again and my heart sank! 

I excused myself from the pharmacy line thinking there has got to be some sort of mistake. In my car, I phoned my mom’s doctor’s office and spoke with the nurse and explained my situation. Wasn’t there a generic that they could prescribe I asked? The nurse told me no there is no generic for this medication and if she did not take it, she was at the risk of death from blood clots! What am I going to do I thought?

Pulled over on the side of the road, tears streaming down my face, I prayed harder than I have ever prayed before. Lord, please tell me what I need to do! Then He revealed it to me. A few years prior, my brother worked for a pharmaceutical company. I remember him mentioning how they sometimes had programs to help pay for medications. Armed with a new mission, I rushed home. I looked up the medication online and found out what company manufactured it. I then looked on the company’s website to see if they had a Patient Assistance Program. They DID!

Many pharmaceutical companies have programs set up that will help patients pay for their prescription medications! You need to search them out for yourselves. Your doctor’s office doesn’t always know about these programs. My mom’s doctor’s office didn’t.

I printed up the application and filled it out for my mom. This particular program required the doctor’s office to have a patient advocate in their office. Several phone calls later back and forth to the doctor’s office and the pharmaceutical company and one of the ladies in the office was officially a patient advocate. (The doctor’s office had no idea this program existed!) Two hours later I was standing in the pharmacy line once again because my mom’s application had been approved by the pharmaceutical company! This time instead of a $12,000+ bill, the new total was $28.00! Pretty amazing right?

Helpful Links:

American Cancer Society – Help Paying for Prescription Drugs

American Cancer Society – Programs That Help Pay for Prescription Drugs

Cancer.net – Navigating Cancer Care

Cancer Care – Sources of Financial Assistance

Needy Meds – Prescription Assistance Programs

Very Well Health – Drug Companies With Patient Assistance Programs

A Few Drug Companies That Have Patient Assistance Programs

• Merck Patient Assistance Program
• Pfizer Patient Assistance
• Johnson & Johnson Patient Assistance Program Application
• Celgene Patient Support

Cancer Organizations

American Cancer Society
www.cancer.org

Be the Match (National Marrow Donor Program)
www.bethematch.org

CancerCare
www.cancercare.org

Lymphoma Research Foundation
www.lymphoma.org

The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society
www.lls.org

Patient Advocate Foundation’s Colorectal Careline
www.colorectalcareline.org

Sarcoma Alliance
www.sarcomaalliance.org

2. Many People Go Through Their Cancer Battle Alone.

One day at one of my mom’s radiation treatments, her sweet nurse Ioni said to me, “Brenda your mom is so blessed to have a bulldog daughter going through this with her. So many people that we treat have no one to help them. They even have to drive themselves back and forth to their treatments!” 
The thought of those poor people battling cancer by themselves made me so sad. To think that they were fighting their cancer alone was a very sobering thought.  If you know someone that is going through a cancer battle, reach out to them. Offer to cook for them, drive them to appointments or mow their lawn. You’ll be such a blessing to their lives!

3. Always Be Thankful.

My mom’s Dr. pulled me aside and told me to get my mom’s affairs in order,  that she did not think my mom would make it through the weekend… of course I kept this to myself. I mustered up every ounce of positivity and love that I could to face my mom and family. 

My mom lived another few months. Months that we were able to spend laughing with her, crying with her, watching movies together, singing songs, talking about our days and sharing memories of favorite times together. We loved each other just a little while longer.

Every extra day we got to spend with our mom was a great blessing that God gave us!

4. My Siblings Are The Greatest Gift That My Parents Ever Gave Me!

Through the entire journey of my mom’s battle with cancer, God & my siblings were and continue to be my rock and my constant! I don’t even want to think about what I would do without them!

5. The Pain Never Fully Goes Away.

There will always be a piece of your heart missing. You just find either healthy or unhealthy ways to cope with the loss.

6. God Will Not Give You Any More Than You Can Handle.

My mom’s death is without a doubt the most traumatic thing that has happened in my life. After her death, I was left feeling angry and guilty. There was such an empty space in my heart. A pain so deep that I can’t explain it. It’s an ache that you only know if you have experienced it. Despite my suffering, turning to God during and after my mom’s battle with cancer gave me and to continues to give me comfort and strength. Strength that I thought wasn’t there.

All my life, my mom has always been a very faith filled woman. The one lesson that she always drilled into me was this. I can still hear her voice saying, “Bren, God will not give you any more than you can handle. But if you feel like it is more than you can handle,  put your worries into a box and give it back to God and say “God, I can’t handle this by myself. I need You. I need Your help Lord.” and Bren, God will help you. He will never give you more than you can bear.”

To Wrap Things Up

Cancer is a terrifying diagnosis no matter how you look at it. Fortunately there are many resources and many treatment options out there. I would encourage you to learn as much as you can about the type of cancer that you or a loved one are facing. Learn about what type of diet you should be eating, treatment options, side effects of medications. Also learn about different services and programs that can help with day to day life and the financial side of things.

May God bless you on your journey!

After my mom’s doctor released her from what would be her last trip to the hospital in April of 2011, my sister and I were determined to give my mom just a little more time with us. All of her doctors said that the traditional methods of chemo/radiation were not working in getting my mom better. We did not let that stop us. We decided to change the way we were thinking about things and went in a completely opposite direction, going the route of holistic treatments. This book was instrumental in giving us the direction to go! It is filled with great information on how to use natural products to improve and maintain your good health. I highly recommend it!